Contest #3 - September 2003:
I was very pleased with all of the entries that we recieved, it took us much longer than we thought to judge these, because of such great quality! Thank you so much to -everyone- who took the time to enter, you all did an absolutely wonderful job.
There were a total of 3 judges for this contest: myself, Nobi-chan, & RubyChan. Each judge was asked to rate each fanfic from 1 to 10 (10 being the best), and was then asked to leave a comment of critique on each one. Each judge was then asked to chose a favourite out of all the entires, and those selected entrants recieved an extra 2 points. The points were then added up, and whomever recieved the most, was the winner of the contest. As you can tell from the results, the judging was very close. Congrats to the winner, and to all those who entered! Thank you all again so much!
~~~ On to the Entries! ~~~
Author: Kero Trigger (~ 1st Place Winner! ~) -Manga Prize!-
Story: "Am I Dreaming, or Am I Awake? ~Of Birthdays and Battles~" (*RubyChan's Pick!*)
Total Points: 29
Ryouko's Comments: A very well thought out story, that emphasized Netto and Saito's relationship very clearly. I absolutely loved the use of Midi and Techno as their net navis! This fic had a very good and solid story to it, as well as a lot of feeling and charisma. A job very well done!
RubyChan's Comments: This one held true to the question, "What would life be if Saito would have lived?" It was touching, cute and understandable. The idea for twins having twin navis was absolutely adorable and creative. Midi and Techno Navis!!!! Oh, gosh! I would love to see them in a drawing! Excellent work!
Nobi-chan's Comments: Well-written. Good descriptions, and excellent grammar (thank you!). I -loved- the names Midi and Techno!
Author: Meta (~ 2st Place Winner! ~)
Story: Beloved Brother (*Nobi-chan's Pick!*)
Total Points: 28
Ryouko's Comments: The end of this story actually moved me to tears, it was so very sad and emotional! A very well done fic, carefully thought out and well written. Saito and Netto's personalities were a bit hard to understand and to get used to, as they were far different from their anime/game counterparts. However by the end of the story, when everything unfolds, you learn the reasons of their behavior. A very different twist on Netto and Saito's world, kudos to you for being unique!
RubyChan's Comments: Even the first paragraph caught my attention. The description was written in a way that it places the reader into the story as a bystander feeling everything going on.
Nobi-chan's Comments: Very well written! Wonderful imagery, and the dream/vision sequences were very Stephen King-like. Fantastic job!
Author: Shimegami (~ 3rd Place Winner! ~)
Story: Never Before, Never Again (*Ryouko's Pick!*)
Total Points: 27
Ryouko's Comments: An absolutely splendid peice! Everything is described very well, and Rockman's emotions are portrayed very clearly. The story is easy to follow along, and nothing is left unexplained. You turned a very simple storyline into a sad tale from the perspective of a Navi, and defined Rockman's wish to be able to be with his brother again very well. A job well done!
RubyChan's Comments: Awww. This was cute, however, the story didn't seem quite complete. I can't place my finger on it. Keep up the good work though! It was well written!
Nobi-chan's Comments: Fantastic. ;_; *sniff* Sad and sweet, and great!
Author: Sigma Knight
Total Points: 26
Ryouko's Comments: Very nice writing, this was a very well done story. Netto's demented behavoir is both disturbing yet interesting at the same time, as we see just overshadowed he is by Saito's perfect character throughout his life. When his world comes crashing down on him, we watch as Netto deteriorates then finally cracks. The journal entries done by Saito give it a nice flare where we can see the story from his more optimistic point of view. Very, very well done, I enjoyed this one quite immensly.
RubyChan's Comments: A very well written story. It was the closest to what I imagined might have happened if Saito would have lived. Good work on the descriptions of the surroundings. The part where Enzan was calling for Blues to come back was so touching.
Nobi-chan's Comments: Very dark, and well-written. The diary sections were a nice touch. Excellent!
Total Points: 26
Ryouko's Comments: Right away you know what the background of the plot is, and what is happening to the characters. The idea that Wily is in full reign due to the absence of Rockman is an interesting idea, and you illustrated it well. Perhaps more should have gone into just exactly what Wily had done to change everyone's daily lives, and what kind of rules are in place that supress society so badly. This would give the characters more depth behind their motivation to carry on the Resistance I believe. Nevertheless, this was a wonderfully written story!
RubyChan's Comments: This entry defiantly held true to answer the contest's requests. So touching! So sad. Poor Netto Kun. The Japanese integration was well used here.
Nobi-chan's Comments: Very good descriptions, and excellent grammar (thank you!). I like the little details, like Saito's heart medicine. Extremely touching, sad but sweet. Fantastic!
Author: Anonymous (Author wished to keep their name withheld)
Story: Rockman.exe - Saito Style
Total Points: 25
Ryouko's Comments: Oh my dear, it was very refreshing to receive such a comedic entry! Switching Saito and Netto's roles was a brilliant idea, though it was very strange to see Rockman act so recklessly. ^_^; Perhaps a bit too much so, if his personality was to relate to the actual Netto's. But none the less it added a lot of flair, and made for an enjoyable story to read. *snirkles* I believe Rockman zipping himself into a zip file was my favourite part. XD
RubyChan's Comments: Whaaaaaaat?!" Meiru whined. "You're sending HIM in to save me? I'm gonna diiiie!" That was a memorable part! It had me laughing hard! The idea of Netto being a navi instead of Saito is so funny! Netto Rockman is not a good idea for a navi, Dr. Hikari Stubborn, lazy, loudmouth. The grammar, punctuation and style was pretty well carried out. the details of the battle scene between Bombman and Rockman were well detailed. another thing that caught my attention was the effort to thank those who
were involved and supported you.
Nobi-chan's Comments: Very funny in many parts. I especially like the way that Netto's personality makes him a terrible navi (e.g. Saito waking up Netto, who ought to have a built-in alarm). Overall plot lacked cohesion, though. Any fic with Chris Farley has to be good!
Story: Part of Your World
Total Points: 23
Ryouko's Comments: I guess people are right when they say "Be careful of what you wish for", ne? Poor Rockman. ;_; I really liked this story, it's quite evident that Rockman's only true wish is to be able to share a normal life with his twin. I would have perhaps extended a bit on Saito & Netto's enjoyment of each other and bonding, the very small amount of time they were given in the fic doesn't seem to be enough to make Saito take on the responsibilities of causing dire consequences because of his choice, according to Rockman's careful and responsible nature. That being my only critique, I enjoyed this story very much. :)
RubyChan's Comments: My my! This entry's ending was quite interesting and unlike most of the others. Some of the content was a bit hard to understand, but was very creative.
Nobi-chan's Comments: Very sweet and sad. Well-written, and the end is absolutely heart-wrenching. Great job!
Author: Yxnomei Geist
Story: A Hitman With A Ghost
Total Points: 23
Ryouko's Comments: This was one of the more unique and interesting stories that I received. The entire tale was written very well, and carefully thought out. The setting however was a bit strange, where the fic is based off a more light-hearted series to begin with. Perhaps if there was a reason for the war, and if it related closer to Saito's family, it would have made a bit more sense. But taking this as a completely original and new spin on the characters and their lives as a whole, this story was wonderfully done!
RubyChan's Comments: Defiantly well written. The grammar, spelling, punctuation, everything was presented in a good manner. However, There was hardly any mention of Netto and how it would have been if Saito would have lived according to the games. Saito couldn't be too much older than Netto. Besides that small factor, great job!
Nobi-chan's Comments: Fantastic work. Your grammar and spelling are nearly impeccable, which I appreciate more than I can say in a story this size. The use of repetition might be a bit much (it's a good device, but better in smaller doses). The story was very dark, and the descriptions and imagery were excellent. It was strange to see Netto and Saito as adults, and especially in a setting so different from any of the normal settings, but you carried it off well.
Story: Rockman EXE: Hub of a Non-Existant Navi
Total Points: 22
Ryouko's Comments: Kudos to you for making up such an original storyline! Instead of trying to bring in a battle against an entire organization, you concentrated on a single event and brought the characters to life. I even found myself becoming attached to Crashman as he was being beaten down by Napalmman. ^_^; My only bother is the lack of Netto, and the brother's interaction. For being twins, they don't seem to be very close or spend much time together. Saito refers to him almost as an afterthought. Other than that, wonderful story, I truly enjoyed it!
RubyChan's Comments: Hub/Saito seemed a little out of character, but nevertheless, it was well written.
Nobi-chan's Comments: Very well-written. Excellent grammar; thank you! Good descriptions, and the dialogue at the end was very interesting.
Story: The Rebirth of the oven fire! The birth of Rockman! Saito's creation!
Total Points: 21
Ryouko's Comments: I liked the way how at the end of your story, you hinted at something that could occur in the very near or far future, but yet you didn't come out right and say it. It implies that Saito knows his days may be numbered, so he made a customization for "Rock" so that it would resemble him in some way, to be a reminder to Netto. A simple story that was made very sweet, good work here. :) All you need is a little work on your sentance structure. ^_^
RubyChan's Comments: A cliffhanger type ending gives charm to this fiction.
Nobi-chan's Comments: A well-written fic, but the underlying plot was a bit bland. The descriptions were a bit lacking, too. Grammar and spelling, though, were very good. You're ahead of the competition there, believe me. A plot with a little more of a twist would have made this fic much better.
Story: Do You Wonder
Total Points: 20
Ryouko's Comments: This was the only poem entry we received, and I found it very touching. I was happy that someone took a different approach and expressed the twin's feelings for each other in such a way. My only critique is that it is somewhat hard to follow. The first 4 sections were done very well, but in the last half you wonder if it's Saito or Netto talking (the first half leads to believe it is Saito). The sudden change to Netto's point of view is a bit disrupting to the flow of the poem. But your rhymes were done very well, as well as your choice of words. :)
RubyChan's Comments: A poem that almost made me cry. I congratulate anyone who can take concept and turn it into a poem that rhymes. Though I liked it so very much, it wasn't a fanfic. It was more like a fan poem.
Nobi-chan's Comments: Very emotional. The use of poetry as a medium was both brave and well-done. ^_^
Story: I Love You
Total Points: 20
Ryouko's Comments: A very cute story about the twins and a daily view of their life. ^_^ Again Saito's personality was portrayed very well, making him simular to Rockman in every aspect. The only glitch I see is the twins physical link to each other, why did it not occur sooner if they are so close? Was there a block of some kind preventing them from feeling each other's pain and emotions? Other than this fault, this was a very sweet and touching story. :)
RubyChan's Comments: The use an explanation of Japanese words was very good. The story was cute and well-written. One little mistake I wanted to point out...it's "Netto-kun, anata ga suki yo."
Nobi-chan's Comments: I like the interaction between Netto and Saito; they're very affectionate toward each other. Good grammar for the most part, but there are -lots- of run-on sentences. I like the fact that a story about Rockman.EXE had nothing to do with netbattling. That set this fic apart from the others. ^_^
Author: Zero & Nami
Story: Saito Dreams
Total Points: 19
Ryouko's Comments: I really liked the "what if" scenerio that you presented here, when Netto is shown the tragedy that would have befallen Saito if he would have lived, making him almost glad that Rockman existed in his own world. I'm not quite sure how Yuuichiro would have pre-determined the twin's personalities so young when he programmed their navis, though. Your sentance structure needs a little improvement, as it was hard to read in some areas. A good story though, nice job!
RubyChan's Comments: Nice combo story writing work here. The grammar and punctuation made it easy to understand. The idea of Axl.EXE being Saito's original navi was touching.
Nobi-chan's Comments: Interesting, if slightly ordinary, plot. Be sure to read up on grammar and punctuation rules before writing fiction, and be sure to -follow- them. Fics are real literary works too. One proofread through this fic would have let you pick out the spots where you left an extra word in or accidentally left one out, and it would have made for a much more enjoyable reading experience. Otherwise, solid work!
Story: Saito's Dream
Total Points: 17
Ryouko's Comments: A good story, with an easy to follow plot. The characters kept their personalities intact, and Saito reflected much of Rockman's traits (responsible, smart, etc). However I felt like some of the plot was left unexplained, or could've been delved into further to help the story have more body. Saito and Netto's dream was mentioned, but no real importance was given to it, it felt like there should have been something more.
RubyChan's Comments: A wonderful idea for a fanfiction. The dream idea was a unique concept in itself. The one problem I had was the ability to keep up with who is speaking and when.
Nobi-chan's Comments: Nice effort. Some interesting ideas, such as the fact that Saito can't remember his life at first. I realize it was just a plot device, but it was a good way to fill in the reader. Some scenes seemed rushed, especially the battle scene. An idea like the mind-reading should have been exploited more, too. Not at all bad, though. ^_^
Story: Rockman Goes To School
Total Points: 12
Ryouko's Comments: An interesting idea, sending all of the net navis to school. ^_^; Giving each one a specific trait turned out to be very amusing, especially poor Elecman and his pink bow. ;) However the topic subject for the contest was about Saito/Hub being alive, which isn't present at all in this fic. Therefor it does not meet the qualifications.
RubyChan's Comments: Elecman in a pink bowtie?! That's cute! The navi at school idea was cute, but there wasn' t much mentioned about Saito. Maybe not any at all. There were no quotation marks to mark who was talking.
Nobi-chan's Comments: Net navis going to school is an interesting idea. Please learn to use punctuation, particularly quotation marks. Conversations don't flow smoothly if it's difficult to tell who's talking. I love Blues coming to school with a paper bag over his head.
Story: Zero Tolerance
Total Points: 10
Ryouko's Comments: A very cute story, where Hub is trying to battle on par with his brother Lan. :) But by your description, Hub seems much younger than Lan due to his actions and behavoir, which doesn't quite fit Hub's character. Hub and Lan are suppossed to be twins afterall. Your writing style is also in the stages that needs much improvement, try capitalizing only the first word, and seperate your sentances into readable paragraphs. Nice try though, it was a cute fic. :)
RubyChan's Comments: This one was funny, but defiantly hard to read. There were no quotation marks and the caps in odd places made it more difficult.
Nobi-chan's Comments: No. Just, no. Your grammar needs work, and the fact that every word was capitalized (some words had a letter in the middle capitalized as well) meant I honestly couldn't read more than half of this thing. When you're writing fiction, never, -ever- use netspeak like "ur" (in fact, that's good advice in general - most people hate it). You need to learn some punctuation besides the period, the exclamation point, the question mark, and the comma. Try throwing a few quotation marks in there, just for fun.
Congratulations to the winner, and thank you to all of those who entered! I hope to see you all again soon!